Right on top of blog rankings

July 1, 2014

Open Parachute’s monthly blog rankings show the right on top:

Visit Rank Blog Visits/month Page Views/month
1 Whale oil beef hooked 1758095 2957997
2 Kiwiblog 445721 771086
3 The Daily Blog 218234 345266
4 The Standard 201495 443470
5 Auckland Transport Blog 155853 160244
6 Throng New Zealand 53729 94004
7 The Dim-Post 53509 75134
8 Sciblogs 39662 50631
9 Liturgy 36160 50478
10 Keeping Stock 33807 53244
11 No Right Turn 26757 35029
12 Homepaddock 26471 36951
13 NewZeal 21726 35094
14 No Minister 20898 27292
15 Music of sound 14879 18833
16 Imperator Fish 13552 17547
17 13th Floor 12544 17630
18 Save our schools NZ 12355 14307
19 Keith Johnson Wellington NZ 12120 12574
20 Offsetting Behaviour 11835 16377

 

The combined total of the top left-wing blogs, which are at third and fourth, is still less than Kiwiblog which is second and miles from Whale Oil in first place.

Dim Post from the left is seventh and Keeping Stock from the right is 10th. I’m at 12, No Minister, which is more right than not is at 14th and Imperator Fish which is left is 16th.

I ditched Sitemeter because I kept getting a window asking me to sign in to it and now rely on StatCounter to record visits:

stats6.14

 

 


If satirists were choosing the leader

September 1, 2013

Imperator Fish thinks David Cunliffe should be the next Labour leader.

I thought that was a genuine view as a member of the party.

But he’s also got a gift for satire and Steve Braunias’ Secret Diary of David Cunliffe made me wonder.

MONDAY

Hallelujah! A new day. A new day for New Zealand. A new day for New Zealand in a new way, and it only added to the excitement when I cut myself shaving with a new razor. I sent out a press release. A crowd gathered. They watched me bleed for New Zealand.

When they left, I got busy. There was a job of work at hand. I bent my head to the task. I applied a dab of Endymoion cologne (a sensual fusion of citrus, spices and leather, $225), ran a Kent switchblade comb (handmade from sawcut resin, $35) though my hair, and looked at my reflection in a pair of Joseph Cheaney shoes (oak bark soles, $895). I liked what I saw.

That left five minutes to kill before the press conference announcing my bid to lead the Labour Party, so I analysed the latest Treasury reports, studied the economic situation in Japan, Ghana, and Sweden, and ironed my Marcoliani socks (cashmere, $117).

The conference went well. A crowd gathered. I felt at peace.

TUESDAY

. . . Met with my own troops. Looked them up and down. Didn’t want to look too closely. Nanaia Mahuta. Louisa Wall. William Sio. Sue Moroney. Someone called Iain Lees-Galloway.

Oh well. It could be worse. Maybe. . .

THURSDAY

Mike Hosking has come out in support of Grant Robertson, and so has Titewhai Harawira.

Poor old Grant. No one deserves that. . .

Just as cartoonists favour certain politicians whose faces lend themselves to caricature, satirists might be biased towards those who make their work easy.

On that basis, if satirists were choosing the leader I think they’d opt for Cunliffe.


Farrar to be stripped of knighthood

February 1, 2012

The Labour Party has announced it will strip David Farrar of his knighthoood because of the value he has stripped from their brand.

“If it’s good enough for Britain to de-knight Fred Goodwin for the damage inflicted on the Bank of Scotland, it’s good enough for us to de-knight Farrar for the damage he does to Labour,” party spokesman Trival Mullard said.

“His use of facts and figures and reasonable approach to issues is continually showing Labour bloggers up as emotional and irrational and forcing us into committing SMOGS..

“He’s always finding positive things to say about the government, MPs and policies. But even worse, he  sometimes even says nice things about us which lowers our reputation in left-wing circles.

“You only have to look at the election results to see just how much damage he’s inflicted on us and come the revolution we’ll be stripping him of his title.”

When told that Farrar hadn’t been knighted Mullard said: “Ha, just you wait, no-one who does this much good for the government and this much harm to us will go unrecognised forever. By the time we get back into government he’ll be Sir David and one of the first actions we take will be to make him mister again.”

Inspired by shock as Labour discover Farrar is not the PM at Imperator Fish

 


Tanty, tanty – updated

September 23, 2011

Tantrums can be entertaining for observers, but they’re rarely amusing for the victims, especially if they’re being defamed.

You would think someone aspiring to be in government might have learned something from the Supreme Court’s granting Erin Leigh’s appeal to sue a former public servant who provided Trevor Mallard with information with which he attacked Leigh in parliament.

But no, Mallard is now besmirching the reputations of several other innocent people in a misguided and unfounded attack on Bill English.

I’m not going to dignify it with a link you’ll find more than enough about what he’s done on the following blogs:

Over at Keeping Stock, Inventory 2 asks what’s upsetting Trevor?

Whaleoil uses it for yet another post on how Labour isn’t focussing on what matters.

Matthew Hooton, one of the people maligned by Mallard, entitles his response Mallard goes mad.

Mallard’s post not only attacks these people it hurts his party and its members, which is what I assume has motivated a brief post entitled Please at Imperator Fish.

The public tantrum is stupid for many reasons including the fact that the daily political round-up at Liberation  which prompted it, covers a range of views and clearly states who sponsors it.

Any link between one of them and the Finance Minister is drawing a bow so long the archer has directed the arrow to his own foot.

Update: Dim Post has some  advice for Mallard in Deep thought punching your weight edition.

Update 2: Kiwiblog reckons Trevor has joined the truthers and birthers.


SMOG pollutes campaign clear-air

August 23, 2011

National Party MPs’ blogs have been labelled boring.

As an active member even I will admit there is some truth in that accusation but there is a very good reason for that. Exciting posts usually generate publicity of the wrong kind.

There is no better example of that than the SMOG (Social Media Own Goal) over at Red Alert which Keeping Stock details:

We’ve blogged a bit about SMOG’s lately; Social Media Own Goals. Well, Clare Curran has scored an absolute beauty today. Over at Red Alert, and under the heading The importance of being Labour, she blogged:

    Have had a gutsful of the white-anting of Labour from both the right and the left of politics.

White-anting is an Australian expression. It means undermining . .

Now Clare, as she proudly points out is a “public relations professional”. So what was she thinking when she followed he first post up with one entitled The importance of being Labour #2? There she blogged:

 And on another note, re white-anting; the attempts by the Greens to encroach on Labour territory . . .

Comments in response from the left aren’t impressed with this born-to-rule attitude and include:

  • Greens white-anting Labour?

    Surely you mean, contesting the same constituency rather than ‘encroaching’, right?

    You seriously think you have the unquestioning allegiance of my vote as a worker?

    I don’t think you need to look to far to see why mobilising labour in NZ is facing a few hurdles with this kind of thinking.

Discussion also raged on Twitter, prompting Dim Post to post on why the left should vote strategically.

 And Imperator Fish asks if Red Alert is damaging Labour.

The answer to that is yes.

There are only so many column inches in papers or minutes of air time available for politics and the last thing any party needs is to have them covering this sort of spat.

It would be better to be accused of being boring than producing SMOG that pollutes the clear air needed to run a positive campaign.


Election strategy working

May 19, 2011

Prime Minsiter John Key in Federated Farmers National Farming Review (not online):

“The environment in which we farm is more challenging than ever before. Retailers and consumers are increasingly expecting farmers to produce a better quality product, while providing transparency of production and maintaining high standards of integrity and sustainability.

Whether we like it or not, these expectations are here to stay and as a farming nation we need to think no only of how we’re going to meet them, but how we’re going to exceed them to take advantage of the opportunities on offer. . .”

Just as well the government appreciates the importance of farming and the challenges it faces because the opposition doesn’t.

Stuart Nash’s strange pronouncement on dairy farmers’ tax payments yesterday got him publicity. However, the real point wasn’t what he said but the underlying message – Labour neither understands nor cares about farming.

If Imperator Fish is right and pissing off farmers is Labour’s new election strategy, it’s working.


Spot the contradiction

March 15, 2011

When John Key ruled out working with Winston Peters, Phil Goff said:

Mr Key was arrogant for ruling out NZ First prior to voters having their say.

“I’m going to let the voters make the decision.”

That was in February. Now, just a little more than a month later he’s saying he won’t work with Hone Harawira:

If the MP is re-elected in November this year, Labour leader Phil Goff says his party would not enter talks with him on forming a Government.

Mr Goff says Mr Harawira would not be a reliable coalition partner.

However, he is not ruling out working with New Zealand First leader Winston Peters if he returns to Parliament.

It’s not just the contradiction between last month’s “I’m going to the voters make the decision” and this month’s refusal to consider working with Hrawira, it’s also his willingness to work with Peters when he’s been kicked out of three coalitions – including one in which Goff was a senior minister.

I could almost feel sorry for Labour supporters like Imperator Fish who posts:

I’m willing to cut the new leader of a political party a bit of slack. Even if they have been around the political scene for years.

But I can barely listen to or read a thing Phil Goff says without groaning. He really needs to be taken aside and given the hard word about gun safety. How can anyone shoot themselves in the foot so many times?

. . . But Goff’s happy to work with Winston Peters, despite Peters being at least as widely reviled as Harawira. The main difference between the two is that Harawira speaks from the heart. He may be unreliable and unstable, but you know where you stand with Hone.

Apropos of  where Peters stands, his infamous NO sign is being auctioned at a Press Gallery fundraiser at the Backbenchers.

John Key says he’ll bid $5,000 for it and David Farrar and Cameron Slater are asking for contributions so they can bid for it.

If we win it, we guarantee it will turn up to most of the public meetings that Winston attends during the campaign. E-mail me if you are willing to contribute towards buying it at the auction, and how much you are able to contribute. If we get it for less than the amount pledged, we’ll divide it up pro-rata. And remember it is all for a good cause – money for Christchurch relief.

Two good causes – the earthquake relief and the fun they’ll have with it at election meetings.


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