They’re on to us

September 15, 2008

Fairfacts Media over at No Minister has revealed the motivation behind Labour’s new-found antipathy to gangs:

AUCKLAND (NZPA): Prime Minister Helen Clark is backing Phil Goff in his bid to ban gangs.
Clark is said to be particularly worried over the threat posed by ‘BluePower’, whose ‘chapters’ are spreading across New Zealand and threaten the government.
The group, headed by John ‘the muss’ Key, is said to be strongest in rural and prosperous areas.
Its members, numbering in the tens of thousands, are said to wear regalia such as suits, shirts and sensible shoes.
The gang is said to be strongest in farming, law and accountancy, with many members reportedly ‘self-employed.’
“BluePower represents a major threat to New Zealand with their activities,” said Ms Clark today.
“Their members and supporters are growing in number and represent a great threat to our way of life and even parliament as it stands now,” she said.
Already the government has implemented measures such as the Electoral Finance Act to try and curb the growth of the gang, by preventing BluePower from getting its message across.
“We just have to take a tough stance to stop this corrupt and cancerous organisation,” Clark continued.
Indeed, ‘corrupt and cancerous’ was the description Clark gave to the former BluePower leader known simply as ‘the Don.’
But now the government fears the wider support of the youthful Key, whose more moderate message is credited in reducing people’s fears of the organisation.
Speaking from his Parnell gang headquarters, Key declined to comment on Clark, though a senior gang member Gerry ‘kicker’ Brownlee said BluePower plans to give Clark and her ‘red patch’ followers “a good beating” early in November.

The Enfield Windsor Ngapara Branch of the Picnic Table convened an emergency meeting to discuss this development.

Members agreed they would remain staunch in their boldly blue approach to clothing and are prepared to  argue wearing red band gum boots and their penchant for red wine will be a mitigating factors should any be arrested.

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