The roll call of the 50 victims of the Christchurch mosque terror attacks show 46 men and four women.
The Muslim requirement for women to worship in a separate space from men cost the lives of more men and fewer women.
That isn’t an argument in favour of discrimination or of women’s dependence.
The deaths of husbands has left some women desperately wondering how they’ll manage:
Widows of the mosque shooting victims are struggling in the wake of the attack. Some of the women needing support can’t drive and don’t hold jobs.
Shakti, a group helping women, has identified 13 families so far where women now facing life as sole providers. Some of them are very young, with young children and new to the country.
Shakti councillor Shila Nair says some women don’t hold a current license, making ordinary tasks more difficult.
“That kind of increases their difficulty by quantum leaps actually because driving is very essential to get to the shops and other places,” she told Newshub.
Others have been in co-dependent relationships and are struggling with everyday tasks. Nair says she visited a widow who doesn’t know how she will adapt.
“She told me, ‘How do I manage? Because I’ve never even gone out and done shopping on my own.'” . .
The outpouring of aroha and sympathy and the show of compassion in the face of evil and tragedy have been heartwarming but most of us are already turning back to our normal lives.
But normal isn’t normal any more for the families of victims.
ACC will provide some financial assistance but the women who have been left without husbands will need more practical help.