Sputative – inclined to spit; of characterised by, given to excessive spitting or salivation.
Two windmills are standing in a field.
One asks the other, “What kind of music do you like?”
The other one says, “I’m a big metal fan.”
My friends and I are in a band called “Duvet”.
We’re a cover band.
With the rise of self-driving vehicles, it’s only a matter of time before we get a country song where a guy’s truck leaves him too.
A few friends and I just formed a band.
We’ve called ourselves “999 Megabytes”.
We haven’t got a gig yet…
When my girlfriend said she was leaving me because of my obsession with the Monkees, I thought she was joking.
But then I saw her face.
Why couldn’t the string quartet find their composer?
He was Haydn.
Why didn’t Handel go shopping?
Because he was Baroque.
Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys?
He was playing by ear.
Two Beach Boys walk into a bar.
“Get a round?”
“I’ll get a round!”
Proposed water tax a ‘burden’ on low-water regions – Stuart Smith:
The proposed new water tax that was announced as part of a swathe of other new taxes potentially facing Kiwis will disproportionally impact on low-rainfall regions like Marlborough.
There are eight new taxes in Michael Cullen’s proposal: the Capital Gains Tax (CGT), tax on vacant residential land, agriculture tax, water tax, fertiliser tax, environmental footprint tax, natural capital tax and a waste tax.
Much has been said about the CGT but the suggested water tax, too, would impact all Kiwis negatively and in particular our farmers, horticulturalists and wine growers in low-rainfall areas. . .
With many farms run by married couples, the role of women in farming is a critical one, a female dairy farmer says.
Jessie Chan-Dorman, a former dairy woman of the year, said male farmers could see everyday how women contribute to the business, and they respect that.
“I would say the percentage of women in farming is at least 50 per cent. Nearly every farming business has a partnership that has historically not been seen. But they’ve always been there.” . .
Studies smoke out fire behaviour – Richard Rennie:
The risk of summer fires is a constant farmers and foresters learn to live with. But the Port Hills fire in 2017 and the Nelson fire last month have brought a human threat to wildfires many Kiwis thought was confined to Australia and North America. With wildfires now affecting rural and urban people Richard Rennie spoke to Scion rural fire researcher Dr Tara Strand about how we are getting smarter at understanding rural fires.
A TEAM of Scion researchers is part of a 27-year history of research into New Zealand’s rural fires, a quiet brigade of climate experts and fire analysts whose job is to help make rural firefighters’ jobs more effective and safer. . .
Grape yield under threat – Joanna Grigg:
Marlborough is experiencing a hydrological drought.
Lack of rain in the mountain catchment has left the Wairau River low, Marlborough District Council hydrologist Val Wadsdworth said.
And summer storage capacity on the plains has been found wanting as a result. January rain of 18mm was soon sucked up by 30C plus temperatures in February. . .
A Waharoa dairy farmer is facing fierce competition in her quest to be named the FMG Young Farmer of the Year.
Sophia Clark will take on seven other contestants in the Waikato/Bay of Plenty regional final in Matamata next month.
It will be the 30-year-old’s fourth attempt at clinching a coveted spot in the national final. . .
(BusinessDesk) – Fonterra director and veteran capital markets executive Scott St John has left the board of the shareholder fund’s manager, the same day the units plunged to a new low.
A notice to the Companies Office last night noted St John ceased being a director of FSF Management Co, the manager of the dual-listed Fonterra Shareholders’ Fund, which gives investors exposure to the cooperative’s earnings stream. He is still a director of Fonterra. . .
Saturday’s soapbox is yours to use as you will – within the bounds of decency and absence of defamation. You’re welcome to look back or forward, discuss issues of the moment, to pontificate, ponder or point us to something of interest, to educate, elucidate or entertain, amuse, bemuse or simply muse, but not abuse.
Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind – Dr Seuss.
1127 Assassination of Charles the Good, Count of Flanders.
1316 Robert II of Scotland, was born (d. 1390).
1545 Thomas Bodley, English diplomat and library founder, was born (d. 1613).
1791 Long-distance communication speeds up with the unveiling of a semaphore machine in Paris.
1793 Sam Houston, President of the Republic of Texas, was born (d. 1863).
1807 The U.S. Congress passed an act to “prohibit the importation of slaves into any port or place within the jurisdiction of the United States… from any foreign kingdom, place, or country.”
1808 The inaugural meeting of the Wernerian Natural History Society, a Scottish learned society, was held in Edinburgh.
1815 Signing of Kandyan treaty by British invaders and Sri Lankan King.
1836 Texas Revolution: Declaration of independence of the Republic of Texas from Mexico.
1855 Alexander II became Tsar of Russia.
1861 Tsar Alexander II signed the emancipation reform into law, abolishing Russian serfdom.
1863 The U.S. Congress authorised track width of 4 ft 8+1⁄2 in (1,435 mm) for Union Pacific Railroad.
1865 The Volkner Incident: Missionary Carl Völkner was hanged from a willow tree near his church at Opotiki during the East Cape War.
1901 The U.S. Congress passed the Platt amendment, limiting the autonomy of Cuba as a condition for the withdrawal of American troops.
1903 In New York City the Martha Washington Hotel opened, becoming the first hotel exclusively for women.
1904 Dr. Seuss (Theodor Seuss Geisel), American author, was born (d. 1991).
1917 The enactment of the Jones-Shafroth Act granted Puerto Ricans United States citizenship.
1917 Desi Arnaz, Cuban-born actor and bandleader, was born (d. 1986).
1919 The first Communist International meets in Moscow.
1923 George Basil Cardinal Hume, Archbishop of Westminster, was born (d. 1999).
1931 Mikhail Gorbachev, President of the Soviet Union and Nobel laureate, was born.
1931 Tom Wolfe, American author, was born.
1933 The film King Kong opened at New York’s Radio City Music Hall.
1937 The Steel Workers Organizing Committee signed a surprise collective bargaining agreement with U.S. Steel, leading to unionization of the United States steel industry.
1938 Ricardo Lagos, President of Chile, was born.
1938 Lawrence Payton, American singer and songwriter (The Four Tops), was born (d. 1997).
1939 Cardinal Eugenio Pacelli was elected Pope and took the name Pius XII.
1942 Lou Reed, American singer and guitarist, was born (d. 2013).
1943 Tony Meehan, English drummer (The Shadows), was born (d. 2005).
1946 Ho Chi Minh was elected the President of North Vietnam.
1948 Rory Gallagher, Irish guitarist, was born (d. 1995).
1949 – The first automatic street light was installed in New Milford, Conn..
1950 Karen Carpenter, American singer and drummer (The Carpenters), was born (d. 1983).
1953 The Academy Awards were first broadcast on television by NBC.
1956 John Cowsill, American musician (The Cowsills), was born.
1956 Mark Evans, Australian bassist (AC/DC), was born.
1956 Morocco declared its independence from France.
1962 Jon Bon Jovi, American musician (Bon Jovi), was born.
1962 In Burma, the army led by General Ne Win seized power in a coup d’état.
1968 Daniel Craig, English actor, was born.
1969 The first test flight of the Anglo-French Concorde was conducted.
1970 Rhodesia declared itself a republic.
1972 The Pioneer 10 space probe was launched from Cape Canaveral.
1977 Chris Martin, English musician (Coldplay), was born.
1989 Twelve European Community nations agreed to ban the production of all chlorofluorocarbons (CFCs) by the end of the century.
1991 Battle at Rumaila Oil Field brings an end to the 1991 Gulf War.
2004 Al Qaeda carried out the Ashoura Massacre, killing 170 and wounding over 500.
2012 – March 2–3, 2012 tornado outbreak: A tornado outbreak occurred over a large section of the Southern United States and into the Ohio Valley region, resulting in 40 fatalities.
Sourced from NZ History On Line & Wikipedia