Saturday’s smiles

As a farmer, I hear lots of jokes about sheep.

I told them to my dog but he’d herd them all.

Why shouldn’t you tell a secret on a farm?

Because the potatoes have eyes and the corn has ears.

Why did the scarecrow win the Nobel Prize?

Because he was out standing in his field.

What do you say to a cow if it’s in your way?

You tell it to Mooooooooooove.

What do you get when you cross a robot and a tractor?

A transfarmer.

What did the neurotic pig say to the farmer?

You take me for grunted.

What do you call the best butter on the farm?

A goat.

Which farm animal keeps the best time?

A watch dog.

Did you hear about the wooden tractor ?

It had wooden wheels, wooden engine, wooden transmission and wooden work.

Did you hear about the magic tractor?

It turned into a field.

I was driving past a farm the other day and there was a field with loads of sheep in it.

I thought to myself “Wow! Look at all those sheep crammed in there. There’s too many to even zzzz…”

What do farmers use to make crop circles?

A pro-tractor.

Who tells chicken jokes?

Comedi-hens.

 

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