A friend emailed these – they are supposedly true advertisements from a UK newspaper:
FREE YORKSHIRE TERRIER.
8 years old.
Hateful little bastard. Bites!
1/2 Cocker Spaniel, 1/2 sneaky neighbour’s dog.
Mother, a Kennel Club registered German Shepherd.
Father, Super Dog… able to leap tall fences in a single bound.
COWS, CALVES: NEVER BRED.
Also 1 gay bull for sale.
JOINING NUDIST COLONY!
Must sell washer and dryer £100.
WEDDING DRESS FOR SALE.
Worn once by mistake.
FOR SALE BY OWNER.
Complete set of Encyclopaedia Britannica, 45 volumes.
Excellent condition…..£200 or best offer.
No longer needed; got married last month.
Husband knows everything.