The Labour Party has directed its MPs and members to stop referring to the failed policies of the 80s and 90s.
The lack of negative publicity the party attracted from its decision to ditch its 2011 election policy to remove GST from fresh fruit and vegetables has emboldened Labour strategists who are charting a new direction.
“I might have a propensity for overlooking bank accounts, but I can not lead a party which refuses to take pride in its past achievements,” Labour leader David Shearer said.
“I wasn’t in parliament at that time nor during the 1999-2008 when “failed policies’ became part of the Labour lexicon.
“It was stupid then and it’s even more stupid now when it’s obvious that the hard decisions taken were the right ones even though the first ones came from the left.
“Those decisions pulled the country up by its bootstraps so it could stand tall on its own two feet, and the four feet of the cows and sheep to which we owe so much of our export income.
“If it hadn’t been for that we’d be wallowing in the depths of depression with the PIGS.”
Mr Shearer admitted to journalists he faced some resistance from a hard-core within caucus but he was standing firm.
“We’ve had a free and frank discussion and we’re united, on this, or as united as a Labour caucus ever could be,” he said.
The left-outers are a wee bit peeved but the careerists are prepared to put potential jobs before flawed principles and the right, well they’re right behind me.
“Failed policies will no longer be part of the Labour lexicon. Instead, we’re getting ready to deliver shiny new lines.”
Mr Shearer said the caucus wasn’t quite ready to go public with those lines yet.
“We’re still chewing a few dead rats and as it’s rude to talk with your mouth full we’ll have to wait until we’ve swallowed them before we’re able to make any further statements,” he said.