Prompted by this week’s news that Gareth Morgan’s war on cats has extended to SPCA staff:
Why don’t cats play poker in the jungle? Too many cheetahs.
What is a cat’s way of keeping law & order? Claw Enforcement.
Did you hear about the cat who swallowed a ball of wool? She had mittens.
Did you hear about the cat which drank five bowls of water? She set a new lap record.
What do you call the cat that was caught by the police? The purrpatrator.
Why is the cat so grouchy? Because he’s in a bad mewd.
What do cats like to eat for breakfast? Mice Krispies.
Where is one place that your cat can sit, but you can’t? Your lap.
Why did the cat run from the tree? Because it was afraid of the bark.
How many cats can you put into an empty box? Only one. After that, the box isn’t empty.
How do cats end a fight? They hiss and make up.
What does a cat like to eat on a hot day? A mice cream.
What do you get when you cross a chick with an alley cat? A peeping tom.
If lights run on electricity and cars run on gas, what do cats run on? Their paws.
What do you call a cat that lives in an igloo? An eskimew.