Quote of the day

. . . At the end of the day, as long as you marry the person you set out to marry, then your wedding was a success. . .  from a post on a Victorian Steampunk wedding – with wonderful photos – at Ruffled.

9 Responses to Quote of the day

  1. Andrei says:

    I don’t know Ele, and I hate to rain on anybody’s parade but it seems incredibly kitsch to me, expensive fluff with no substance.

    If people want to dress up like clowns and find some expensive venue to exchange hallmark greeting card platitudes – well its a free country I guess.

    The problem is though that this is not an option for the poor so as the “cultural elite” descend into meaningless and shallow, vapidities the poor get left behind and no longer bother with the institution of marriage at all,

    And leave you to wring your hands with statements like this

    Making it normal for all children to grow up in a loving home with the loving support of wider family and friends ought to be the goal of the Green paper on vulnerable children.

    But how do we achieve that when loving, supportive families aren’t the norm for far too many parents?

    Because at its heart, before the “moderns” got their hands upon it, marriage at its heart was about “Making it normal for all children to grow up in a loving home with the loving support of wider family “

  2. homepaddock says:

    Andrei – I think the quote expresses what you are saying, the marriage is far more important than the wedding.

  3. Andrei says:

    then your wedding was a success. . .

    “The operation was a success but the patient died”

  4. Gravedodger says:

    Around 50 years ago swmbo and self mutually agreed that the next step in our quite brief relationship that literally started across a room of some 20 souls from a position of complete ignorance of the others existance, was marriage.
    Father bless his departed soul, made the comment to me on my informing him and Mater that we were engaged, “it wont last”.
    Of course he may yet be correct in his assessment but present trends indicate it will be the traditional ending of our marital state and not what I took his prediction to mean.
    I have long held a personal if somewhat cynical belief that the greater the “palava” a wedding presents to the adoring public the shorter the marriage, certainly the state of “being in love” but in the absense of hard data the theory is still no more than that.

  5. homepaddock says:

    No Andrei – the operation was only successful because the patient lived ie the marriage lasted.

    GD – congratualtions and may the traditional end be many happy, healthy years away.

  6. Andrei says:

    Ele;
    GD also expressed some cynicism at the end of his comment.

    The sad fact is if you look at the stats that at least 1/3 of all marriages end in divorce and that the rate of marriage is in severe decline ie a large proportion of the population no longer even bothers with it – because it is so hollow and now a days a sham in many though not all cases.

    Whether you like it or not we have people who lead the culture and if such people are trashy then the culture becomes trashy.

    e.g. Angelina Jolie with her tattoos has lead to a proliferation of tattooed women and girls – what do you think of that?

    And the behavior of the likes of Kim Kardashian and her treatment of the noble and venerable institution of marriage is beyond despicable but it does impact upon the impressionable, sadly.

    This is why Royal Weddings are very good things while the fact that Prince William and his Bride lived together before marriage is a bad thing – they both set an examples for better or for worse.

    Anyone who knows history can read of cultures in decline and what their eventual fate will be.

    Our culture which is busily producing a generation of tattooed harridans who will happily murder their unborn and who are unfit to be brides. It does not have long to go I think.

  7. homepaddock says:

    Andrei – it is very sad that so many marriages end in divorce. My interpretation of the quote was getting it right fromt he start by focussing on the person you’re marrying not what GD rightly calls palava.

    I’m a celebrant and I always tell couples that if they’re relaxed and happy on their wedding day everyone else will be too regardless of whether or not everything goes to plan; and that the wedding is just the start and what follows matters far more.

    I’m not a fan of tatoos on anyone.

  8. Andrei says:

    Let me share something with you, a real treasure – an excerpt from a Byzantine Rite marriage service. This is Byzantine Catholic, rather than Orthodox, a lot of our Priests maybe most would not like and probably not allow it to be videoed so as not to distract from the gravity of the occasion. Its the same rite and service regardless and this wasn’t invented on a whim five minutes ago it is at least 1500 years old – it has stood the test of time.

    But listen to what is said to the couple in a break from the Rubric at the end of this clip. Some things of great importance including one fact that is unbreakable – they can never ever again have this service under any circumstance. If one dies and the survivor wants to remarry they can but not with this service – its a one time only deal it is serious,solemn and joyful.

    And every thing in it has meaning! This is what I want for my Son and daughters

  9. homepaddock says:

    Thanks Andrei – it was as you say “serious,solemn and joyful” which is how a commitment to marriage should be.

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