Highlanders fans upset about the change of colour for their team’s jersey have had their worst fears confirmed – it’s all about the sponsors.
A leaked memo to the Highlanders’ Board from the sponsor says:
We are committed to widening our voting base and extensive polling suggests that an association with a rugby team will do that for us.
Our MP enjoyed his first foray playing for the Parliamentary Rugby team and that has given us the confidence to embrace the Highlanders and their Southern Man ethos.
Although, since the team has no tradition it won’t matter if we tweak that a bit, will it? We could replace the bagpipes with pan pipes and introduce Morris Dancing at halftime.
We’re prepared to invest heavily in sponsorship. All we ask for in return is that the team changes colours for us and adopts parsnip wine as its beverage of choice.
It’s time to end the silly notion that sport and politics don’t mix. If you give us the jersey we’ll find the money.
Yours in sport
Green Party of Aotearoa New Zealand