National: for every dollar in tax cuts there is also some expenditure on priority issues dear to the public’s heart – this is the nearest you’ll get to having your cake and eating it too.
Labour will take the cake you’ve baked, share it around and, when pressured, give you some of the leftovers.
ACT will provide no cake. They will however, give the tax cuts needed to enable you to purchase a dietary plan of your choice which depending on how well you manage your allowance may or may not include cake.
The Maori Party will hold a hui and invite you to share the cake you bring as koha.
New Zealand First will ask you to pay for cakes that it will sell, give away or eat themselves as its leader sees fit.
The Green Party will legislate so you have to make your own cake from low fat, low sugar, high fibre, home-grown, organic ingredients and share it with your neighbours. It will also tax any fun you have while doing it, nationalise all the bakeries then force you to eat state baked cake.
The Libertarianz will ask, “Why do we have to have cake anyway?”