Tonight 10 finalists will perform to claim the prize in Britain’s Got Talent.
Tonight all will be important to their family and friends.
Tonight the eyes and ears of the world will be on just one.
Tonight we’ll wait for the ordinary woman with the extraordinary voice.
Tonight our hopes and prayers will be with the one who has won our hearts.
Tonight, we’ll dream with her and for ourselves.
Tonight she’ll affirm that because she can, we can too.
Tonight’s the night, Susan Boyle, sing your heart out.
Sing for your mother.
Sing for your family, your friends, your village.
Sing for the other ordinary people who have extraordinary gifts.
Sing for us.
Sing for yourself.
Sing your heart out because
Tonight our hearts are with you.
Tonight’s your night.
Tonight’s our night because of you.
Paddy wants a job, but the foreman won’t hire him until he passes a little maths test.
Here is your first question, the foreman said. “Without using numbers, represent the number 9.”
“Without numbers?” Paddy says? “Dats easy.” And proceeds to draw three trees.
“What’s this?” the boss asks.
“Have you no brain? Tree and tree plus tree makes 9” says Paddy.
“Fair enough,” says the boss. “Here’s your second question. Use the same rules, but this time the number is 99.”
Paddy stares into space for a while, then picks up the picture that he has just drawn and makes a smudge on each tree.. “Ere ye go.”
The boss scratches his head and says, “How on earth do you get that to represent 99?”
“Each of them trees is dirty now. So, it’s dirty tree, and dirty tree, plus dirty tree. Dat makes 99.”
The boss is getting worried that he’s going to actually have to hire Paddy, so he says, “All right, last question. Same rules again, but represent the number 100.”
Paddy stares into space some more, then he picks up the picture again and makes a little mark at the base of each tree and says, “Ere ye go. One hundred.”
The boss looks at the attempt. “You must be nuts if you think that represents a hundred!”
Paddy leans forward and points to the marks at the base of each tree and whispers, “A little dog came along and pooped by each tree.
So now you got dirty tree and a turd, dirty tree and a turd, and dirty tree and a turd, which makes ONE HUNDRED!”
Paddy is the new supervisor.
The ODT reports on an Austrian tourist who had to be rescued after going tramping wearing street shoes with a sleeping bag, a foam sleeping roll and a can of baked beans.
Search & Rescue called him naive.
“The man did not think he was in any trouble, but we don’t think he had an appreciation for conditions.”
You can’t stop people doing stupid things when they don’t know what they don’t know.
But is it possible to train people to think about consequences before they do things when they don’t know what they’re doing?
Day 30, the penultimate day of the tune a day challenge for New Zealand Music Month.
Deborah Wai Kapohe sings her own composition, New Zealand Rain.
Catching up on yesterday’s posts:
Fat Freddy’s Drop is singing Wandering Eye at Keeping Stock
Mi-Sex sings Computer Games at Inquiring Mind