Saturday smiles

A young man with a communications degree was employed by a bank.


One of the first tasks the manager gave him was to draw up instructions for the newly installed drive-through teller machines to enable customers to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles. 


It took him ages and when the manager asked him why he said it was because he needed two sets of instructions. The first was the procedure for men:


1 Drive up to the cash machine.

2 Put down your car window.

3 Insert card into machine and enter PIN.

4. Enter amount of cash required.

5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt.

6. Put window up.

7. Drive away.


Then the procedure for women which was somewhat more convoluted and went:

1 Drive up to cash machine.

2 Reverse back the required amount to align car window to machine.

3. Put on hand brake.

4. Put window down.

5. Find handbag, tip contents onto passenger seat to locate card.

6. Turn the radio down.

7. Attempt to insert card into machine.

8. Attempt to insert card into machine.

9. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive distance from car.

10. Insert card.

11. Reinsert card the right way up.

12. Rifle through contents of handbag to find diary with your PIN written in code on the inside back page.

13. Enter PIN

14.  Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN.

15. Enter amount of cash required.

16. Check make up in rear view mirror.

17. Retrieve card.

18. Empty handbag again to locate wallet and place card inside.

19. Re-check make up.

20. Drive forwards two feet.

21. Reverse back to cash machine

22. Retrieve cash and receipt.

23. Re-empty handbag to locate wallet again and put cash and receipt inside it.

24 Give appropriate hand signal to irate male drivers queuing behind.

25. Restart stalled engine and move forward.

26. Drive a kilometer or two.

27. Release hand brake.


And the manager’s response?


She fired him.

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