It’s neigh a joke

January 31, 2009

No foaling fooling – you can still be charged with being drunk in charge of a horse.


Saturday’s smiles

January 31, 2009

Watch for the following mergers on Wall Street: -

 

Hale Business Systems, Mary Kay Cosmetics, Fuller Brush, and W. R. Grace Co. will merge and become: Hale, Mary, Fuller, Grace.

 

Polygram Records, Warner Bros., and Zesta Crackers join forces and become: Poly, Warner Cracker.

 

3M will merge with Goodyear and become: MMMGood.

 

Zippo Manufacturing, Audi Motors, Dofasco, and Dakota Mining will merge and become: ZipAudiDoDa .

 

FedEx is expected to join its competitor, UPS, and become: FedUP.

 

Fairchild Electronics and Honeywell Computers will become: Fairwell Honeychild.

 

Grey Poupon and Docker Pants are expected to become: PouponPants.

 

Knotts Berry Farm and the National Organization of Women will become: Knott NOW!

 

Victoria ‘s Secret and Smith & Wesson will merge under the new name: TittyTittyBangBang.


Portia’s defence could protect pastoral leasehold property rights

January 31, 2009

The National Business Review (print edition) reports that Fullbright scholar Ann Brower and co-author John Page are challenging whether tresspass laws apply to land farmed by pastoral leaseholders.

Fish & Game have already made a similar challenge by seeking a declaratory judgement from the High Court after a Crown Law opnion supported leaseholders’ contention that they had exclusive possession of the land they farm.

Pastoral leaseholders, supported by Federated Farmers and the High Country Accord, have a different view and are concerned that if the challenge is successful it will give the public a right to roam on leasehold land.

They are consulting lawyers for help but I suggest they also turn to Shakespeare – The Merchant of Venice  Act 4, scene 1:

Tarry a little;—there is something else.—
This bond doth give thee here no jot of blood;
The words expressly are, a pound of flesh:(315)
Take then thy bond, take thou thy pound of flesh;
But, in the cutting it, if thou dost shed
One drop of Christian blood, thy lands and goods
Are, by the laws of Venice, confiscate
Unto the state of Venice.

Pastoral leases apply to the land exclusive of improvements so while the land – or flesh – is owned by the public, the blood – the fertility, pasture, trees, fences, gates, tracks and buildings are the property of the leaseholder.

That means that even if the court ruled that trespass laws don’t apply to the public land those wanting access to it would have to get it without laying a finger – or a foot – on so much as a blade of grass because that and all other improvements are owned by the leaseholder and subject to the usual protection of the laws which applies to private property.


Love and romance not just for the young

January 31, 2009

Some good news for aging baby boomers - love and romance improve with age.


Ode To A Jet-Ski Person

January 30, 2009

 

This Friday’s poem is dedicated to all those whose summer peace at the beach or lake has been spoiled by these motorised overgrown bumblebees.

Ode To A Jet-Ski Person was written by Michael Leunig and comes from Poems 1972-2002, published by Viking.

Ode To A Jet-Ski Person

 

Jet-ski person, selfish fink,

May your silly jet-ski sink,

May you hit a pile of rocks,

Oh Hoonish, summer, coastal pox.

 

Noisy, smoking, dickhead fool

On your loathsome leisure tool,

Give us all a jolly lark

And sink beside a hungry shark.

 

Scream as in its fangs you go,

Your last attention-seeking show,

While on the beach we all join in

With ‘Three cheers for the dorsal fin!’

 

     - Michael Leunig -


Chop chop

January 30, 2009

The Aussies have got it: the only rescue package we need is wrapped in butchers’ paper . . .

Although vegetarians may prefer this  from Busted Blonde.


Why the surprise?

January 30, 2009

Maori can’t agree on a flag, what’s surprising about that?

New Zealanders as a whole can’t agree about whether we should keep our flag or not and if not what should replace what we’ve got so why would a sub-group of us agree on a flag?

Cactus Kate and Quote Unquote offer some suggestions.


Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 1,367 other followers

%d bloggers like this: